They Suck, the feature film script, paperback
Written by Kevin Risk and Regan T. M. Pazuzu.
Warning! This comedic horror genre screenplay contains scenes with excessive (but funny) gore, as well as sexually explicit (but funny) scenes.
A mutated vampire with extraordinary and extremely unnatural thirsts rises from his grave. One of his victims is a tidy, obsessive-compulsive named Nicole Ridley, who is later found “dying” by her enraptured, animal-loving fiancé, Robert Spavor. Robert and his animals struggle to save her, to no avail. But she rises as a new vampire and her lurid escapades soon attract the attention of the Head Vampire himself, as well as her ex-lover, Robert, who then realizes the intense gravity of the situation. Will Robert’s love for Nicole triumph over death? He will make it so, or die trying! He enlists the help of his troubled, childish friend Terry and together they wage a war against these new grotesque vampire mutations that culminates in the silliest, most vulgar, blood-stained, gory epic battle ever created!